Lexa Story - BPspouses


Lexa's Story October 2003 Once upon a time, there was a boy who lived in rural Arizona who loved to roam the desert to search for indian pottery, wildlife and go shooting. Well, that little boy grew up (at least in height) and married me. Fast forward, 1997. Mark was working at the local mine as a pipe fitter when he met me. He had just proposed, and I asked him to think of what he wanted to do for the rest of his life. He said "I want to do Law Enforcement." Mark gave up his job, and went back to school to start taking Admin. of Justice classes. After we got married, Mark started working for the state prison system and continued taking college classes, but was trying to gain experience to go to work for a police station. January 1, 1999 we had our first child, and we were still working for the prisons. In Late 1999, after trying for a police station, and missing the test by one point, we started looking around at what other options were available. A few days after our daughter's first birthday Jan 2000, We were at my parents house and he mentioned, "Oh by the way, I put on an online application for the Border Patrol." I said, "What brought this on? I know your mad about not making the police test, but you don't have to go to extremes." Mark said, "Actually, I found this web site, HonorFirst.com, and it sounds like it might be up my alley." We had no idea the process involved to get hired. A few weeks later, we received the packet for testing in Feb. 2000. The test looked harder than his police test, and the artificial language part looked like a nightmare. But, he found out that afternoon that he had passed with a little room to spare and a few days later I found out I was pregnant! After a whirlwind of day-trips to Tucson for vision, physical, oral board, and countless other small errands, the summer came with word that we just had to get through a background check. Three months passed, and after only hearing from the FBI once ;) we finally called Twin Cities. They told us, be patient but we would be called soon. It was September, and we still hadn't heard, and I was due Oct. 17th. We decided that if they called, we would put them off until after our baby was born. But... When they called Sept. 15th and offered Tucson Station, we couldn't believe our luck and decided to take it. Mark moved me to my parents house, quit his job, and did all of our COBRA applications in the next week and a half (for the week we were going to be without insurance). Mark left for Charleston Sept. 27th 2000. Sept. 28th was his 25th Birthday. Seven days later Caroline was born. (Mark got to hear me scream on the phone at him while I was pushing, so he didn't get out of it totally.) I had always been very co dependent, so I was lost without him at first. I had our second daughter Oct. 5th, and my mother (who was supposed to be taking care of me) had an emergency hysterectomy on Oct. 17th. I then had to take care of my 22 month old, a new born, my mother, and my two younger brothers (my father worked out of town and only came home on the weekends). I had the baby blues, but couldn't let Mark know. I had to stay positive, so he could make it through out there by himself. We talked every night on the phone, and wrote letters. We sent each other gifts for our anniversary and he got to come home for Veteran's Day and Christmas (since Christmas was on a Monday) The academy was horrible. Especially the first two weeks, when they try and psych you out, telling you how you can't do anything right, and your PT Teacher is saying, "If I put a Hamburger out in front of you, you would run faster" Spanish and Law were both equally hard, but they had good tutors to help him through it. Instead of going out with the guys, he would stay at the academy and study. It was hard, but he had the determination, and got through the academy. I moved to Tucson by myself a month before he graduated, and I was scared to death. I hadn't ever lived in a large city, and all I could think about was the crime rate! February 9th 2001, Mark graduated from the Academy with his parents watching. I wasn't going to fly with two kids! I picked him up at the airport, and he had a few days off before going back to work. I had a hard time with his schedule at first. I wanted him to work the eight hour days again (or the Four Ten's he did at the prison) and spend all his extra time with us. I couldn't understand why he didn't come home after ten or twelve hours. I really hit the fan when he had his first sixteen hour day, and he still had to go back in that night. After his seven month exam, things got a little less stressful, and we jumped for joy when he passed his ten month. To celebrate, we bought a house to be built in a small town south of Tucson. His Year Anniversary passed quietly, just as his Three year one did this past month. Mark loves his job. He still gets to go hike in the desert looking at "wildlife" and play around in a 4X4. To see it now, there was never a more perfect job for him. We just had number three child May 4, and I am adjusted to the Border Patrol way of life. They say there is a 75% divorce rate in the BP. I think it is just the lack of support or the lack of understanding of the job that comes between them. It is not a job, it IS a way of life. Those inside understand. Don't expect those who aren't to understand why you show up to family activities Saturday afternoons by yourself, or why your husband has to work the night of Christmas Eve. It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it. Take care of yourselves, and your spouse! Lexa [TOP]	SPONSORS

Lexa's Story

October 2003

Once upon a time, there was a boy who lived in rural Arizona who loved to roam the desert to search for indian pottery, wildlife and go shooting. Well, that little boy grew up (at least in height) and married me. Fast forward, 1997. Mark was working at the local mine as a pipe fitter when he met me. He had just proposed, and I asked him to think of what he wanted to do for the rest of his life. He said "I want to do Law Enforcement."

Mark gave up his job, and went back to school to start taking Admin. of Justice classes. After we got married, Mark started working for the state prison system and continued taking college classes, but was trying to gain experience to go to work for a police station. January 1, 1999 we had our first child, and we were still working for the prisons. In Late 1999, after trying for a police station, and missing the test by one point, we started looking around at what other options were available.

A few days after our daughter's first birthday Jan 2000, We were at my parents house and he mentioned, "Oh by the way, I put on an online application for the Border Patrol." I said, "What brought this on? I know your mad about not making the police test, but you don't have to go to extremes." Mark said, "Actually, I found this web site, HonorFirst.com, and it sounds like it might be up my alley." We had no idea the process involved to get hired. A few weeks later, we received the packet for testing in Feb. 2000.

The test looked harder than his police test, and the artificial language part looked like a nightmare. But, he found out that afternoon that he had passed with a little room to spare and a few days later I found out I was pregnant!

After a whirlwind of day-trips to Tucson for vision, physical, oral board, and countless other small errands, the summer came with word that we just had to get through a background check. Three months passed, and after only hearing from the FBI once ;) we finally called Twin Cities. They told us, be patient but we would be called soon. It was September, and we still hadn't heard, and I was due Oct. 17th. We decided that if they called, we would put them off until after our baby was born. But...

When they called Sept. 15th and offered Tucson Station, we couldn't believe our luck and decided to take it. Mark moved me to my parents house, quit his job, and did all of our COBRA applications in the next week and a half (for the week we were going to be without insurance). Mark left for Charleston Sept. 27th 2000. Sept. 28th was his 25th Birthday. Seven days later Caroline was born. (Mark got to hear me scream on the phone at him while I was pushing, so he didn't get out of it totally.)

I had always been very co dependent, so I was lost without him at first. I had our second daughter Oct. 5th, and my mother (who was supposed to be taking care of me) had an emergency hysterectomy on Oct. 17th. I then had to take care of my 22 month old, a new born, my mother, and my two younger brothers (my father worked out of town and only came home on the weekends). I had the baby blues, but couldn't let Mark know. I had to stay positive, so he could make it through out there by himself. We talked every night on the phone, and wrote letters. We sent each other gifts for our anniversary and he got to come home for Veteran's Day and Christmas (since Christmas was on a Monday)

The academy was horrible. Especially the first two weeks, when they try and psych you out, telling you how you can't do anything right, and your PT Teacher is saying, "If I put a Hamburger out in front of you, you would run faster" Spanish and Law were both equally hard, but they had good tutors to help him through it. Instead of going out with the guys, he would stay at the academy and study. It was hard, but he had the determination, and got through the academy.

I moved to Tucson by myself a month before he graduated, and I was scared to death. I hadn't ever lived in a large city, and all I could think about was the crime rate!

February 9th 2001, Mark graduated from the Academy with his parents watching. I wasn't going to fly with two kids! I picked him up at the airport, and he had a few days off before going back to work. I had a hard time with his schedule at first. I wanted him to work the eight hour days again (or the Four Ten's he did at the prison) and spend all his extra time with us. I couldn't understand why he didn't come home after ten or twelve hours. I really hit the fan when he had his first sixteen hour day, and he still had to go back in that night. After his seven month exam, things got a little less stressful, and we jumped for joy when he passed his ten month. To celebrate, we bought a house to be built in a small town south of Tucson. His Year Anniversary passed quietly, just as his Three year one did this past month.

Mark loves his job. He still gets to go hike in the desert looking at "wildlife" and play around in a 4X4. To see it now, there was never a more perfect job for him. We just had number three child May 4, and I am adjusted to the Border Patrol way of life. They say there is a 75% divorce rate in the BP. I think it is just the lack of support or the lack of understanding of the job that comes between them. It is not a job, it IS a way of life. Those inside understand. Don't expect those who aren't to understand why you show up to family activities Saturday afternoons by yourself, or why your husband has to work the night of Christmas Eve. It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it.

Take care of yourselves, and your spouse!

Lexa

[TOP]

SPONSORS